Day 105

Kennedy with Effie (child life volunteer)

Today I feel depressed as I walk into my empty house.  I left Kennedy at the hospital with dad at 7pm and Maddox is at Grandma’s.  It’s been a tough day at the hospital and it’s hard to be alone.  Kennedy did well; she’s been a bit nauseated but overall handled the intense chemo okay.   Two other kids were admitted at the same time as us and they have a much tougher battle a head.  There is one 12 year old little boy with AML leukemia in for a fever (diagnosed 6-weeks ago) and another little girl who is just 11 years old with osteosarcoma, diagnosed only a week ago.  Today made me realize how lucky we are that Kennedy was diagnosed with ALL Leukemia – is it even possible to say we are lucky when cancer is involved?  Never would I want to be in the shoes of the parents that were there today.   AML or Osteosarcoma cancers don’t have such favorable odds and these little kids are in for the fight of their lives.  I’m emotionally drained because I know what these parents feel and I’m scared for them. 

Tonight I am packing for a work trip to Vegas.  Part of me is nervous about leaving and another part of me can’t wait to sleep.  Is that even possible – sleeping in Vegas?  I was excited to leave a week ago and now I just have a huge pit in my stomach and choose to blog instead of pack, it makes leaving less real.   Maybe if I actually sleep tonight, I’ll have energy to pack tomorrow.

Kennedy playing Wii

Kennedy and I had a great day today.  We spent most of the day in the playroom and ended our time together hanging out in the movie room with Kennedy and I trying to figure out a Wii game.  Dad brought dinner later and the three of us had a date night watching the Muppets. 

We talked to the doctors about Kennedy’s upcoming steroid/vincristine mix and she will be getting a script for morphine just in case the bone pain makes its presence.  I can’t imagine going through what we went through 8 weeks ago without something to ease the pain.  Hopefully if we have the med, we won’t need it.  Things seem to affect her differently all the time. 

I’m leaving for my trip on Sunday, will be back on Wednesday, and won’t have a chance to blog until Thursday - the day she starts her steroid.  Praying for an uneventful few days and no reaction to the week-long steroid/chemo mixture.